Finding Myself

While pulling out tiny pieces from my chest of memories, I found myself. As I reflected over each trinket, each moment of laughter and fun shared with my children, and grasped tightly to the pearls of wisdom, the precious gem of God’s Word had wrapped me in a whirlwind of faith, prayer, love, mercy, grace and the Love of God barreling me through the tunnels of darkness that my life had been so surrounded with. As a result, I realize every treasure I’ve held dear, forgotten, thrown away, or burned has made me who I am today. The key to each treasure is to keep the things that help and discord or destroy the things that hurt and don’t forget to remember the lessons learned from each.

In life, there are hidden treasures' that may never be uncovered or discovered unless there is some digging, prodding, or drastic excavation measures taken. However, we are not the ones to know what tools are to be used. Some are buried so deep into our hearts and minds that we do not want to expose them for fear of what others might learn. But until we trust in God's Word, Romans 8:28, “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.” We may never know the true essence of God’s Love nor the depth to which he teaches us to love. God used His Precious love to open my heart to the painful memories stored deep within. He allowed me to experience the devastating effects of adultery and mistrust to see that I have the power through him to forgive and not be destroyed by Satan. 

What I didn’t understand at first was that each phase of my life, whether good or bad was allowed by God and through his Holy Spirit, the Comforter and Lover of my soul kept me and drew me closer to him. My children are the greatest treasures I have no matter the circumstances. They are a gift from God through rearing them I learned so much because I had to stay on my knees, constantly read the word of God and listen to Him speak to me. As I released them into His care I had fewer worries and many blessings. I learned the virtues that God wanted in me for His Glory. I have been able to burn, the painful unfaithfulness of my mate, not become bitter and resentful but receive the purging, healing, breaking forth, and evolving of the person that is within. That through it all God loved my husband through me and kept me safe as my husband received salvation. He wrapped me in the fireball of His love and I survived knowing that God keeps on blessing me through His love. My heart is again filled with laughter, joy, and a smile that generates deep within.

                                                Thought for Today 

Take a moment to reflect upon your life, remembering who kept you through the past, brought you to the present, and will carry you into the future. God

The Meaning of Morning Dove-the Treasures of A Memory

The title Morning Dove was chosen because of the cry this beautiful bird makes in the early morning. Because of their cry it is called the Mourning Dove. If you can imagine, you can hear the sound muffled in their throat. When you hear it, it alerts you to your surroundings. Therefore, I felt that this dove was describing my emotions. 

At the point of losing my home in foreclosure, fighting to keep a roof over my husband and daughter, (we received the victory) my husband having several strokes, plus aneurysm, fall and the revelation of three children or more that he fathered during our marriage all I could do was mourn. Each time I became pregnant he would be angry then I understood why. Tears would not have helped because I was too hurt, disappointed and broken. Sleep often eluded me because three of my children literally stopped speaking to me and forbade their family from interacting with me. Sometimes I felt I would fall down beneath the weight or that the hounds of hell would overrun me with destruction. Many nights I would pray pleading with God to tell me what had I done so wrong. He would either speak to my spirit with a song or word which would allow me to rest. The negativity my husband was speaking against me; I think some of the children believed but the hurt came because I thought they knew me better. I had prayed with them, for them, over them loved on them, often talked to them about salvation and breaking of yokes in the family. Yet Satan used them to try to destroy me but God, do you understand but God?

The good news is that God has a damage control mechanism that man does not understand and it is called love. God never stopped allowing me to feel his love, even when all I could say is I love you Jesus or sing beautiful songs he had put in my spirit. I now thank him over and over again for being the Lover of my soul. The protector of my heart and life. For the five children that never wavered in their love nor constant calling to let me know how much they loved me. Needless to say that two are what society calls in-laws but I could never address any of my children mates as that because they two became one and I would not have my beautiful grandchildren. So like the mourning dove I have stopped the mourning cry and my wings are getting stronger each day ready to sour to the skies knowing that God loves me and he gave me the healing mechanism I needed but did not know I did. I can say thou the evil one sought to slay yet shall I praise Him for His goodness and blessings. Sometimes you have to speak what the heart feels, in order for you to be truly healed.  

Scripture:  Romans 8:28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

                                                 

 

Open the Treasures of Memories

Unlock the chest of memories and pick through the treasures of life,

Reflect on the times of laughter, hold close the gift of love,

Keep the trinkets of fun, cherish the moments of kindness,

Forgive others for their wrongs as you forgive yourself also.

Remember the pearls of wisdom you gathered along the way,

Hold close the diamond of prayer that keeps’ you day by day,

Polish the silver of hope that strengthen on this journey,

And cherish the gold of faith that lights your path.

Don’t become bitter over things that cannot be undone,

Rid yourself of the debris and open up your heart,

You may find a wealth of blessings and richness beyond compare;

For you have survived and may find again the rare gem of love.